iGod - Part I

I AM ALL-PRESENT
for The Journey Christian Church
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I am... bright blonde hair sticking out of a too-big head, static cling pullin' at it, wool Christmas sweater not helping. Am child. Am princess, am center of the party, am digging under the tree like a bee to honey, wrapping paper tossed here and there, thick rug carpet somewhere underneath it all. Am curious like crawling into cardboard boxes, mischievous like hiding in Mamaw's closet, cute as a kitten like squeakin' out "Jesus loves me this I know" in front of the whole family. Am 4 years old. Am a doll.

i am.

I am... voice high and off key, big braces flashing the congregation like, "Bam! I got a solo in the youth choir!" Am energy. Am adolescent. Am middle school piano lessons, intramural basketball, am all kinds of passing notes in class - old enough to know what name-brand jeans are, poor enough not to own any, but hip enough to tight roll the ones I got. Am in love for the first time... every - single - day of sixth grade. Am a puppet.

i am.

I am... crackin' a joke at my locker as the seniors strut down the hall. My friends laugh at me and I am a hair tossing, twirling, crimping, big bangs sporting junior - boy crazy like I need something to change - my - life. I am youth group on Wednesdays, french-kissing on Friday nights, and Sunday School on Sunday mornings like it was God saving my soul and not Brian Whitson. Am myself and my shadow. Am a mannequin.

i am.

I am... moving the tassle from the left to the right and the only one of my friends not getting married. Am college graduate like Mom and Dad are so proud and college graduate like wanting to rip up every photo they're snapping - like I don't know what to do with my life. Am a blonde haired, perfect smile, life of the party, college graduate with a degree and no office to hang it in. Don't want to work for Dad, can't teach like Mom, and 22 years of "I'm sinning and I know it" to even ask God what He thinks. Am a blank stare, fake smile, and broken heart. Am a shell.

i am.

not alone... but feelin' that way.
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I WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU OR FORSAKE YOU. Joshua 1:5

Why Pray

I know I don't go to the journey anymore but I still love to write.....

Through prayer comes healing
Through prayer comes rest
Through prayer comes freedom
Through prayer we invest.
Prayer is eternal,
Prayer speaks the truth,
Prayer is one thing that draws me close to you.

ASSIGNMENT BY TUESDAY FEB. 28

Write a poem - any style or format - called "Why Pray?"

Regrets relief

Regret this sickness in my soul,
wishing and wanting to redo the past.
Wishing you knew me when my soul was whole,
wanting to build a thing that will last.
Knowing forgiveness and knowing the truth
are the only remedies for the seething pain.
Knowing my heart has been uncoth,
with only God's love to wash it like rain.
He is my lover constant and true
he is my song when I am alone.
He is the helper and comforter too,
in his loving arms I am finally home.

The Dream

Two nights ago I dreamn't I was nuzzled in a broken bed on a blanket of snow
The delicate snow soaked me not,
There he stood at the edge of my bed,
not the golden angel with flaming sword
my recent sleep keeper, but God himself his visibility veiled by his presence.
Like the movie Angles in America my surroundings akin to Harpers antartic dream.
Then quick cut to a train cars,
where a toe headed boy leads me through odd adventures only we fathom.
We are laughing and joking love passing between us.
I awaken to realize my hope lies asleep in dreams
waiting for the promise of hope to awaken into reality.

Pit to Palace

My hiding place from the storm
In the midst you find me
And shelter me in the shadow of your goodness
A better place a safer place
A place of refuge then restored
I find my feet I take a step
I look unto but nothing
You've pulled away I fell away
Neither in the quiet of the moment
To grow to change to manifest
What was taught in that storm
And on the peak before

Festivals and Writing Competitions!!!

HeyAll!!!

I have a list of 5 upcoming festivals that include writing competitions!!!---YEAH!! It covers all genre's and there's one I really don't know anything about other that the competition info.

Chicago Horror Festival, Chicago IL
January 1,2006-- Earlybird Deadline

2006 Eerir Horror Film Festival, Edinboro PA
January 2,2006--Earlybird Deadline

Toofy Film Fest, Boulder CO
January 2, 2006-- Earlybird Deadline

FAIF International Film Festival, Los Angeles CA
February 15,2006-- Earlybird Deadline

Salento International Film Festival, Lecce Italy
April 30,2006-- Earlybird Deadline

*** Without a Box lists over 30 film festivals!!! Most festivals have an entry fee, some are only taking film or music submissions and some will be accepting scripts****

Healthy In A Sea of Bacteria

Bacteria surrounds me in a dog eating dog ungracoius world,
Only the strong survive.
Division and paranoia no one talks about the truth,
No one knows what it is.
Healthy communication attacked by emotional blindness,
I long for my family freedom to be and feel the truth that sets you free,
like an apple a day keeping the deamons away, my parents.
Our generation lost and gripping thrown together between white walls
in a profession built on the direction of dreams by others. No real power.
I Healthy in a Sea of Bacteria, choking for one more year longing to break free.

Father in Four Dimensions

My father is strong

...His body teaches me
......A man’s skin is tough like an orange rind,
......A million pockmarks acceptable on him but
......For me a cautionary tale against squeezing my pores
...He smells natural—no aftershave or cologne, just courage
...I stand on his shoes and embrace his waist
...His large hands encircle my arms and
...He walks me
My pastor is wise
...From the pulpit his anecdotes burn my cheeks but
...His baritone puffs my chest,
...Expertly wielding words like a sword,
...Shifting smoothly from tongue to tongue
...But under dissent his shoulders stoop
...Grandpa’s old black suit hangs off his frame
...Praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost
...Eyes closed, I hear his shoes shuffle down the aisle
My mother’s husband is cold
...Her yes is his no
...Her no is his yes
...The devil whispers, he listens
...Not your blood—just your wife
...He demonstrates
......How to abuse without raising a hand
......By withholding words, funds, respect,
......Love.
My father is weak
...His body teaches me
......Diabetes labors breathing
......Insulin swells the gut
......Introversion carves deep lines in skin
...He smells like clogged pores and unwashed hair
...Behind his eyes, angels and demons wage war, cloud his vision
...His needle-pricked fingers curl around my arm and
...I walk him

Dad

smart
articulate
balding
comb over
Old Spice
trucker hat
dramatic
wacky
understanding
supportive
communicative
strong
vain
confident
loving
workaholic
creative
wonderful